Monday 11th April 2016

Today my beautiful daughter, Freya, is 11 years old! How quick does time fly?

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Last week Nathan was 16! Where has the time gone?

We went to my friend, Holly and John’s wedding – who I met with Maria and Emily when our babies were a week or so old and have been friends ever since.  Here’s a picture of us girls and all our big babies now….

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So we celebrated the birthdays by going on a mini trip in our caravan……

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I love our caravan – we have been on so many family adventures around the UK and I’ve missed it while I’ve been poorly.  Last year Phil bought it home just so I could sit in it on our drive!

So off we went to Norfolk – we stayed near Wroxham on the broads.  Luckily the boys could help set up and do some of the heavy stuff as I just can’t do it anymore – I feel so disabled now! Grrrrr!

But we had a wonderful time and it was good to get away – we went to Pleasurewood Hills for some traditional fun….

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…. unfortunately I couldn’t go on many of the rides due to the rock boob and the pain it causes! So no roller coasters or bumpy rides for me! But everyone had fun……

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…. we also found a brewery that made Phil very happy, and ate out so I didn’t have to cook.

We went into Norwich for Nathan’s birthday and ate at Captain America’s burger bar – my family love burgers!

…. went out on a boat, bought Nathan a new coat for shooting – which made him happy! It’s feels great when your 16 year old, laid back son, shows some enthusiasm and excitement! Not on my scale of course but he was happy!

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We went to Horsey beach to see seals – best thing ever! This made me so happy! I could have sat watching them all day.  Phil has promised we can go back next January to see the fluffy babies!

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We played cards and board games!  Lewis’ description of a ‘Hedge’ was the funniest “it’s green and you can push people into it!” Unbelievably I managed to guess it too! We laughed til we had tears! The best thing is having my family all together in one small space – instead of everyone spread out in separate rooms using wifi!

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But, it’s also good to be home and the kids are happy to have wifi back! Although I am pretty good at making myself do normal stuff, and making myself look ok, what people don’t realise is that it has taken me 3 days to recover! I have been totally wiped out – the cold weather is not good for my bones and joints and I’ve been in a lot of pain! Unfortunately I think this is something I better get used too and learn to live with now.

We still plan to go to Cornwall in the summer and I hope it’s warmer, but it makes me sad that long term we may have to sell our beloved caravan if we’re not going to be able to use it more often (we have a mortgage on it and need to make it worth keeping). We shall see – not going to worry about this at the moment.

So this week……

Today I had a late appointment come through at the hospital to discuss my ovaries. I haven’t felt very well anyway and wasn’t looking forward to this. I had prepared myself for a battle. It’s hospital policy not to remove ovaries unless the BRCA genes test positive – Dr Loo had already warned me. I explained that I had been referred by my oncologist, not as a preventative, but to allieviate the need for monthly Zoladex injections (which are not nice at all – the ice block is becoming my best friend for these lately). But to our amazement the GynaeOncology Consultant, Mr Evans-Jones, we met with agreed it was a “no brainer” for me to have them removed – hooray! It has to go to the board to be agreed but he said I have a very strong case and even if they didn’t agree he would still do it! Just brilliant! I can’t believe how honest and straight forward he was – totally old school – thank you! He also agreed to film my op for me to watch (weird I know but I love the medical stuff!) Unfortunately my ovaries and tubes can’t be donated for research – I asked – he said they’re no use without the hormones and these hormones are not good for me! And we got to chat about dogs, shooting and games fairs too – he was nice!

It will be keyhole surgery, hopefully in and out in a day with a couple of weeks recovery. He said surgeons would be queuing up to do the job! Phil and I looked at each other puzzled??? And he said it’s because I’m slim! They’d be easy to find! Made us laugh! Obviously still risks with more surgery, infection etc, but should be straight forward.

He advised that the intense menopausal side effects could last for the rest of my life – there is no way of telling if they will ease no matter what remedies I try. But it’s a risk I need to take. These include continuing hot flashes and night sweats, dry itchy lady bits (I think I can get some gel if I remember my pharmacy days), lack of sex drive – which is bad anyway thanks to cancer and drugs! and worst of all weak,  painful bones and joints forever which could get worse! Phil is already worried about hugging me too tight – now he really could break me! Just great eh broken bones to add!……. so we stopped him there, I’m sure there’s more but sometimes best not to know everything. He said I need to up my exercising to strengthen my muscles to protect my bones. Oh the joys. I’m going to need to get Bear Grylls’ influence or a super good personal trainer and some serious mind over matter. But needs must. This is the right thing to do so not an option. Feels so strange to be happy to be having my ovaries removed. They are good ovaries and they made my children! Oh well another piece of my womanly bits going.

So, I have to wait for the Herceptin to finish (June). Then recover for a few months. Then surgery probably end of September/October. The plan is coming together like the ‘A’ Team!

The rest of this week….. I am looking forward to getting back to work tomorrow as I’ve missed my students and work friends. Bloods tomorrow too – ready for Number 15 Herceptin on Wednesday. Oh I hope I take it better this time. Think positive I can do this!

I must be well enough for Freya’s birthday party on Saturday! But luckily I have it all planned and organised at the Lion – just need to bake a cake!

Meanwhile there is always something to do at home – it’s never ending. I find it extremely hard to sit and rest. I’m turning into my mother and constantly picking bits up from the carpets! ha ha! But this is a good thing – my mum is amazing and I hope I am like her and still running about at 70! Can’t imagine another 25 years on at the moment though – get well soon Mum (she has a terrible cough and cold – low immune system from cancer too!)

Will update again soon x

 

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